The Virtual Reality of Social Media

Interactions on social media are booming. Facebook is THE main social media network.  Facebook is an online community with a blend of reality and virtual reality.

The virtual component is an evolving big time problem.  Virtual is very close to being something without being it; existing or occurring on computes or on the Internet. Hence, the virtual component is not an actual reality. The Internet facilitates an unnatural movement or intrusion into an inaccessible or uninvited reality.

Now, with Facebook, there are "Bookers" and "Lookers".  This is great and oftentimes a lot of fun.  "Facebookers" are those who post regular updates, "memes", photos, likes and comments. 

Facebookers are indeed engaging and put the fun in Facebook. Then are are "Facebook-Lookers".  Essentially with Facebook-Lookers, there is no problem. For many reasons, these folks prefer a voyeurism role in just reading others updates, comments and such. As long as the "Lookers" are only looking in a passive role, then there is no problem at all.  The worlds of Facebookers and Facebook-lookers can or should peacefully co-exist.

But, there is a one more element.  This is what I call the Facebook-Intruders.  The group of problematic folks go through Facebook timelines watching, looking and snooping. Then, they bring into  the virtual world issues from their sad reality.

Now, I enjoy "looking" on the virtual world of Facebook because in reality, I am a people watcher. I enjoy the photos and such, will do a "like" and move on.  I NEVER take my reality into another person's virtual or real world / life through the conduit of Facebook.  That would be intrusive and I am not a Facebook-Intruder.

However, this type of intrusion has been taking place with an increased frequency. I am disappointed... but I am in control of this situation.  For the past year, I have been effectively using the wonderful tools provided by Facebook and my own common sense approaches. Check them out.

Prevention

• Never accept "neighbors" as Facebook Friends.  They are just too close for comfort.  They sit back and watch your every move online, then verify in the real world.  Like going on vacations and such. 

• If someone makes an uncomfortable comment regarding your Facebook update, do not argue, just use the privacy control setting to manage this nuisance.

• Do not go on Facebook, ranting about an offense.  Just, block or use the privacy control setting.

• Beware of all "private or Inbox messages".  It is usually a covert approach to ask for a favor.

• It is okay to accept total strangers as a Facebook friend, but, if they send a private message shortly thereafter, just Unfriend then follow through with the important BLOCK.

Additional recommendations:

#1- Limit privacy setting to Friends only.
#2- Never reply to questions.  I know what I post, you do not need to know anything else.. so go back into your world.
#3- Unfriend folks who are intrusive, then follow through with the BLOCK!
#4- Create a "custom" privacy setting; thereby effectively limiting certain "friends" from viewing any updates, but not necessarily a block.
#5- Beware of "Inbox or Private Messages" being transmitted through Facebook.  Usually the person is ashamed about the message and uses this private route. 

Finally, in reading this blog, if you are offended, I advise you to Unfriend me, then follow through with a BLOCK.  Its okay.

Avoid Chatting with Strangers During Air Travel

JUST DON'T DO IT!  Shut Up! 

Some years ago during a 3 hour flight to fabulous Las Vegas, a woman and her husband sat next to me. This rude woman ran her motor mouth to me as soon as she boarded. I had never met this woman before in my life!  Years later, I still wonder why she talked incessantly to me, instead of her husband!  That is her husband's job to listen to her motor mouth!

Well, halfway through the flight, she got up to use the bathroom.  Her husband then sat next to me.  Ahhh... very pleasant.  When the woman returned, she fidgeted in her aisle seat so much, her husband then changed seats and the bitch started running her mother mouth to me again about some nonsense bullshit!

I have experienced other situations, but not so extreme.  I have encountered folks who start up their motor mouth during decent and run their mouth nonstop until landing 20 minutes later.

These have been such awful experiences that I decided I would never let that happen to me again!  Some fellow travelers are too inconsiderate, disrespectful, self-centered, rude and TOO STUPID to shut up!  They are so pathetically lonely that they feel that during the restricted plane ride, they have other folks' unconditional attention for a few hours.  Well when it comes to me, that is a LIE!

Since that flight many years ago, I made it policy to NEVER SPEAK to fellow passengers. The most that I say is... "Is that seat taken?" My brother, Jon Williams, advised me to always take my iPod, so when the adjacent passenger starts yacking, just wave them off and put the earplugs in.

I just returned from a flight last week... 3 hours from Las Vegas.  I actually started having a little sympathy for fellow passengers.  Maybe I was being too cold, insensitive, unnecessarily stoic and too standoffish to fellow passengers.  I was thinking, maybe I should lighten up.  But yesterday, I read a former co-worker's Facebook update regarding the obnoxious passenger she experienced!  It was awful!   

So, I will maintain my long-standing policy.  Do Not Allow Fellow Passengers to Say Anything to Me During Travel!  My policy is the right thing to do!  Conversations are 2-way exchanges.  I do not give strangers the right to yack to me non-stop.  If I do not engage, then shut up!!!!

Here is a 5-point breakdown of my air travel  policy.  I advise others to adapt/adopt it as well.

#1- Be prepared.  Always have your earplugs / headset.

#2- Avoid eye contact or smiling with the adjacent passenger.  If you have a long flight and give that signal to chat... you will NOT be able to stop the motor mouth once it stops.

#3- Do not hesitate to use the "hand-wave".  The "hand-wave" is a nice and nasty, but polite gesture that means, SHUT UP!

#4- If you stay firm by not engaging and the chatter continues, you may have to ask... "Are you talking to me?"  After that, do not answer!  Just shrug your shoulder!

#5- DO NOT START SOMETHING THAT CANNOT  BE STOPPED! Do not engage!!!!!

So what if you hurt their feelings!  Big deal!  They are strangers anyway!  You probably will never meet them again.

Here are two possible outcomes, #1 you will have an annoying flight or #2 you will offend and hurt an intrusive stranger's feelings.

 Remember, it is your choice, your decision.  There are no in between options.

My advice:  Enjoy Your Flight; Don't Be Polite!

Southwest from MDW April 2014

Southwest depart McCarran - May 2014

Southwest landing at MDW - May 2014